Your responsibility for your teen

Here's a little known fact about responsibility:

It's impossible to be responsible
for things over which you have no control.

"Responsible for" is the same as "taking ownership of." You're responsible for the spouse you marry, the job you choose, the quality of work you do, the car you drive, the home you own, the size of mortgage you take on, the friends you have, how you spend your money, and so on. You have control over those decisions, and you make those decisions based on what you think will be best for you.

Making these decisions satisfies your need for freedom - the freedom to choose. It also satisfies your need for power - having some control over your own life.

You have control over your own decisions, your own behaviour and, to some degree, your environment - but you DON'T have control over the decisions your teen or anyone else makes.

It's impossible to be responsible FOR your teen.
And it's impossible to MAKE your teen responsible.

The good news is that, if you create a safe environment, you can influence your teen's decisions.

In the next post, I'll discuss your teens' responsibility for themselves.